For those interested, briefly: I am now in Texas again, doing a crapload of medical and administrative stuff for the next week and a half, give or take, and there are once again two cats in the house.
Little more detail on the second bit. Apparently after pushing the screen out of the window (no witnesses, and the two involved parties refuse to elaborate further than guilty looks and "meows") for some reason Lila decided that it'd be a good idea to climb a tree. My money is on running away from the large black stray cat that's stalking the neighborhood from what I understand, although she may have simply wanted a good view of the area. 40 feet later she realized cats are not good at climbing down.
Reports are the neighbors closest to the tree were pretty awesome about things and kept an eye on her, and she got to spend a night or two in her little kitty treehouse. This afternoon Manda haggled with a helpful local tree service company, and after Lila was extracted from the tree (and then extracted from the operator, I guess she didn't want to let go) she's now home and acting like nothing happened (which is a good sign.)
Anyway, the 4 hours of sleep in the last three days is catching up, so I'm probably going to work on that.